I enjoyed Wakehurst so much yesterday we went again today - this time with Gwyn because he had a day off. There were a few phone calls to make about the flat so I got the children out of his hair for an hour and went to that indoor haven of inspiration: asda.
I had one of those awful embarassing mother moments while we trawled the aisles when Ruby exclaimed loudly out of nowhere, 'what's wrong with that ladies leg's?' On looking in the direction to which she was pointing I saw a poor elderly lady with such enormous legs from water retention I wanted to curl in a ball. Obligatory ssh's followed and I got down on Ruby's level and explained that we could talk about it in the car but we don't talk about adults we don't know right now. This led her to point and mock whisper 'that's the lady,' each time we passed her. Fortunately for me this unfortunate lady also appeared to be pretty deaf. This was embarassing moment #1.
When I finally got some stuff for our picnic - I pulled out the car park and could hear a strange buzzing. I discounted it. Then I heard it again and saw an insect beetle thing of about two inches on the right of the dashboard. I am not good with insects at the best of times. Ruby calls them 'monsters'. I of course behave as best I can when I'm around them with reasonably good levels of success providing I have a glass, cardboard and gloves. During the day I am in charge of removing them from 'our home' and putting them in 'their house' which is 'outside'. I pulled over calmly and tried to flick it out with a leaflet but it wasn't happening. Those legs were meaty. I'm shuddering thinking about it. A few minutes later I wasn't getting anywhere.
As luck would have it there was a trailer what? about 30 metres away from me because I was in the empty bit of the car park so I shamelessly shouted very loudly whilst waving like an absolute lunatic, 'excuse me! Please! - can you help me?' to a man in a dark green t-shirt with the words 'landscape' with a flourescent yellow waistcoat. This looked like the sort of man who could sort out a problem like this. I wonder what he thought the problem was at first. Probably something alot more serious than a beetle. He did the decent thing though and came over. And he did sort it out with his bare hands no less (yuck) whilst I did the horrified weird dance I usually reserve for Gwyn when he gets rid of a big spider. This involves clutching the sides of my face and jogging on the spot muttering 'oh my God' and making 'urgh' noises much like a 3 year year old might.
My God was I grateful. 'It's just a beetle,' he said holding it up to my face and letting it fly away. I don't even care that when he got back to his trailer he turned and shook his head at me laughing with the face of someone who despaired of some people. I don't feel stupid, I just feel very pleased I did not have to touch it. Phew. I guess this constitutes embarassing moment #2.
Embarassing moment #3 (everything comes in 3's) is something to do with taking your child to the loo and then going yourself. It includes loud exclamations of the differences in anatomy between a childs body and your body and in this case was also followed with 'AND YOU'VE GOT NIPPLES' at the top of her voice.
Yes. Thankyou Ruby. Yes. I do.
You may have noticed the photos are significantly better than yesterday. That's because they are Gwyn's. Credit where it's due. Wakehurst was beautiful. Those bluebells....amazing.